Imaginary friends became a sign of intelligence. The more detailed the back story, the more likely we’ll believe you. Desks are limited to their wood. Instead of carving smoking pipes, try for a chimney. They end inside each other like surgeons. The scalpels are available to anyone, though how to handle them is a little more complicated. We can teach you. There is a method. Just take a few steps into the tunnel and wait for the beep.

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Drew Kalbach lives in Philadelphia. He has work in or forthcoming from No Posit, decomP and dogzplot. He has a blog at this-blog-is-a-piece-of-art.blogspot.com.